Breaking Rules

I felt my tears trickle down. I quickly wiped it away and forced a laugh. “I just hope that you’re here. Giving me some advice. Telling me what’s the right thing to do.” Maybe if they were here, my life would be different. If they’re here, maybe. I’m always happy. Maybe I’m not drowning in loneliness after all.

I kept shedding my tears. The sun’s out already but I’m still here visiting alone in my parent’s grave. I waved goodbye to them before I finally went out of the cemetery. Before I finally decided to go home, I first went to the nearest convenience store. I quickly paid the cashier who was on her poker face as I gave her the money. She didn’t even bother to smile at me. She raised an eyebrow at me as I watched her face making me averted my eyes from her. There was an empty seat there, so I sat in it. I was in the middle of eating a cup of noodles when I noticed some children. They are homeless children attempting to make a living on their own. I even saw someone knocking on a recently parked car. However, neither the door nor the window open. I decided to buy some snacks and exited the convenience store. It was too late for a night’s sleep, and they were still on the road. Just to make enough money to eat. Where are their parents, and are they being forced to beg on the road? I approached the boy who was still knocking on the window of the car. I gave him food and messed up his hair. His face was dirty, and he was dressed in large clothes. I can’t help but feel sorry for him. But my pity couldn’t help him, though. They don’t need sympathy. But assistance from other people. However, there are only a few good-hearted people who help someone like him. “Thank you, sister.” I smiled at him. I also gave it to the other kids and they all thanked me. “Thank you very much, sister.” I smiled at him. I also gave it to the other kids, who all thanked me. When I gave them some food, they all smiled, their eyes are telling me like I’m an angel. And it flatters me. They are undeniably good children, despite the filth painted on their faces. I’d like to know where their parents are but I couldn’t pull myself to ask.

Anyways, they are adorable. I can’t stop myself from pinching their cheeks. I sat next to them and watched them eat. And somehow I felt relieved as I watched them. It was only a matter of time before I was left alone. Some of them have already returned home, but the certain boy earlier is still not leaving. He was eating the food while looking innocently at me.

My lips formed into a smile. He approached me, and I was surprised when he hugged me. I was so taken aback that I couldn’t help but part my lips in great shock. It was purely heartwarming.

I bit my lower lip and returned his hug. This is something I will do again and again with no regrets. Even though I don’t have much money either. I’ll never get tired of offering even a little help to people like them. If I had my own money, I might have adopted them. But that is clearly not possible.

Maybe one day. I’m going to do some charity work.

Well, I guess. It was one of my goals anyway. “Are you really all okay, Miss?” He asked as he sat beside me. We simply sat by the side of the road. Observing other vehicles passing by on occasion. There were also other pedestrians, most of whom were students, walking on the other side. I gave the little boy a nod and looked up at the sky. Tonight there are no stars. It was nothing but a blank sky. Just like me. Empty. “Miss, you’re not fine. I can tell you’re sad because I can see it in your eyes. Why are you sad?” I couldn’t answer him even if I wanted to. My condition is still a problem for me. What a shame. I don’t want to be pitied, but here I am, wallowing in self-pity. Nonsense. My tears began to flow once more. I’d known for a long time that my tears were shallow, so when I felt damp on my cheek, it didn’t surprise me. But my tears were being wiped away by little hands. I fixed my gaze on the young boy who stood in front of me. I smiled as I grasped his hand in mine. He’s wonderful. Hopefully, he is spared from the world’s violence. I hope he has a happy life ahead of him.

I gently squeezed his cheek. He smiled and hugged me once more. “Don’t cry anymore, sister. You are currently sad, but a day will come when you will be happy.”

That truly makes me feel better. But when is that going to be? He hugged me well before returning to his seat beside me. I stared at him after wiping the tears from my eyes. He whistled a well-known tune. Then he gave me a friendly smile. “You’ll see, sister when I’m grown. I’d like to work as a pilot. My mum wants to see the world. So I’d like to become a pilot so that I may show her around. I’m going to fly her on my plane.” His story made me smile.

However, his face became gloomy for a brief second before he looked up at the sky. “Unfortunately, we don’t have that lot of money. Studying to be a pilot is expensive. Yet, I still want to be a pilot.” I stroked his hair. “Someday, your dreams will come true. More than you think.” We stayed there for a couple of minutes while looking at the night sky. Although the child has returned home, I am still sitting on the side of the road. I can’t even help myself to stand up and went home. All I want to do now is sit and think. I wish I could make a complete decision when I return home. That was crystal obvious in my head. I want to get through with this. It’s as though I’ve run out of things to think about. I’d like to be able to breathe freely again. I don’t want anything else to think about. However, while I remained there staring blankly at the street, I noticed a pair of shoes in front of me. My gaze was drawn upwards to see who it was, my lips parted in shock. “Sera …” My tears rolled down my cheeks. What is he doing here?Text property © Nôvel(D)ra/ma.Org.