Obsessive Flames of Love

09:00 PM. 6th September

Curled up on the soft bed under the quilt, “Ah! Why I’m unable to fall asleep?” Grabbed her teddybear, hugged it, and covered her eyes in an attempt to roll off to sleep.

“Ugh! After such an exhausting day, why the hell I’m feeling lousy rather tired?” Sat upright unwillingly, “This isn’t going to work. I shouldn’t flee.”

“You are beautiful inside out, Tanvi.” Riaan’s words echoed in her mind. “I’m looking for a bright future ahead of us.” The conversation earlier with Riaan shook her, “You seemed to be a good person Riaan. I don’t want to crush your hopes.”

Rested her head on the headrest and closed her eyes while her lips quivered with a mumble, “I know you like me with the way you are with me.” Her mind wandered off, “I’m feeling good with it too. But am I ready for it?” The question which she was deliberately trying to dodge caught her.

A Sprung of fear attacked her. “Can I truly have a normal life?” Anxiety kept on building inside her belly, and it became difficult for her to breathe. Gasping heavily, “you need to address it.” Her inner voice begged her.

Her shaky hands slid the wooden drawer beside her bed when her heartbeat began to pound hard as if her chest was about to rip open, clutched her pictures, which she ducked for so long with trembling hands, “why did I become this miserable? Can’t I be happy with what’s going on?

With narrow eyes, glaring at her old self, which she successfully concealed from everyone else, a rush of old memories hit her. Pangs of pain overwhelmed her when her eyes turned moist, and drops of tears escaped.

Gripped the bedsheet in her fist, a lump stuck in her throat while brushing them. Silent tears made its way down her eyes. Her eyes squeezed shut with the torment in her inner self while loud shrieks escaped her lips until she became a shivering mess and slowly drifted to sleep.

She stood outside her house on a busy day with bright sun burning her cheeks. People and vehicles were moving as fast as they can, and children were running on the streets while street vendors were shouting icecream. Dried leaves fell on the roads, and the hot breeze heated her body.

Fidgeting with the buttons on her black shirt, while her sneakers were buzzing with the tapping of her foot. Hair strands slipping onto her neck from the messy bun with blows of wind.

She hopped into a car. Paid the bill, strode as fast as she can, and tripped in between while hurrying into the mentioned address with unexplainable emotions, and befell into oblivion facing it as if a bolt of lightning pricked her.

Shouts deafened her, and her breath paused without knowing how long? The simmer of hurt in her cracked out into unstoppable tears while she ran out in a try to avoid the reality.

Lying on the couch with no trace of hope in her eyes, as if she was a lifeless person. Throwing everything near her sight while her hands were bleeding and throat became hoarse with the squawking, she woke up from her nightmare with a piercing scream.

Beads of sweat dripping off her body, gasping to breathe while a part in her remained in shock until she’s shuddering. “No! This can’t be…” Sniffles harder and choked out while hugging her knees.

“Will I ever be freed… from this horrible… past?” She stumbled in sobs with her timidness. Curled herself into a ball in a corner of her room and let her fear overtook her while biting her salty lips hard.

The sobs were stifled at first as she attempted to hide her grief, then overcome by the wave of her emotions. She broke down entirely, all her defenses washed away in those salty tears.

After some time, she tried to stand up and tumbled off, but forced herself with faltering steps she reached her bathroom. Flipped the shower on and drizzled herself from the agony drenched deep down in her nerves.

Held her mobile from the wooden nightstand, “03:00 AM?” Her puffy eyes widened. “I couldn’t sleep anymore. I can’t risk it again.” Rubbed her eyes, she browsed her mobile while trying to distract herself from the mental anguish that’s bothering her to the core.

Nonetheless, nothing was helping her, and she decided to check her emails. Scrolling through it, one of them got her attention. It’s from her manager with a subject, “Mr. Chauhan is managing the blockchain project.”

Her eyes widened in curiosity, “Mr. Chauhan, will be abroad for a few weeks. However, Tanvi, you still need to communicate with him directly regarding the project. Since it includes the entire security of the Chauhan Group of Companies information, Mr. Chauhan is personally taking care of it. Do your best in this as well.”

“Ooh! So, I’m going to work with him?” She pinched her lips when her little encounter with him lit her up. The brim of her lips turned into a slight curve. “I’m lucky that I got a chance to work with you, Mr. Chauhan.”

“I know it’s tough to work with you, but somehow I’m looking forward to it.”

Checked her Whatsapp when some unknown people messaged her from the matrimony sites. Stared at them, “I’m not at all interested in this nonsense.” She pondered and opened their profiles in the matrimony site.

Analyzed every profile with patience, “They aren’t apt for me.” A conclusion drew on her lips with knitted brows. Then she saw a picture and unconsciously opened the profile. “Ishaan Rudra Chauhan?”

“What the fuck? Why did he use a matrimony site?” Her eyes popped out, “He can easily get whomever he wants with his personality. Many were trying to get him. Then why the hell is it?” Her fingers landed on her chin and floated away.

After brainstorming for a while, “whatever it is. That’s none of my business.” She sighed and started noticing his profile. “Wow, he’s sure a perfectionist. Every word about him is so great.”

Glancing at his picture, their encounter tricked her mind. She forgot her grief for a while and was mesmerized by the charm of Rudra. “I wonder whom he will marry?” A sting of jealousy bit her when her lips cramped, “she’ll sure be lucky, I presume.”

Looking into the details better, she’s further intrigued by his profile. With around three hours, after glancing and analyzing at his profile, “Oops! He was far beyond my reach.” She concluded with a slight disappointment biting her swollen lips.

“I’m no match with him in any regard, either physical beauty or finances.” She blurted out, “I’m not on par with him. I don’t stand a chance against him.” With that, she decided to put the thoughts of him aside and sighed helplessly with a sulk.

06. 30 AM, 7th September

Splashed herself with plenty of cold water, she stared at the blue sky through the window in a daze, the heavenly hue brought her serenity while the water droplets were drying on the stripes.

The chirping sounds of birds, cool breeze, a fresh earthy smell made her turmoil rest at bay. Lost in her thoughts, vibrations of her mobile snapped her back.

It’s Riaan. Grabbed it and rooted over there with a conflict until the sound goes off. “Ugh!” Stared at it blankly, “shall I call back?” With a shook, “no, No! That’s not a wise step in my present mood.”

Dejected, she stayed still when her phone rang again. Her fingers hovered on the sliding green color when thousands of questions came attacking her mind. She finally answered at almost the last ring. “Hey!”

“Hey, Tanvi!”

“Hmm”

“Your voice seems a little hoarse?”

“Ahem..”

“Are you alright?”

“Um… Ye… yeah, I’m.”

“Did anything happen? Tell me what it is? I will see the end of it.”

“Hehe… Nothing, I’m good.”Upstodatee from Novel(D)ra/m/a.O(r)g

“Um… So, what’s up?” She cleared her throat and decided to change the topic since she possibly couldn’t answer any of his questions.

“I had a dream about you,” Riaan said in a perky mood.

“Oh!” She gasped, “It’s unexpected.” she mused.

“Is it?” A mumble sounded like a question fled from her lips.

“Yeah!! It was a beautiful one!”

“Mm-hmm. What’s there in it so beautiful?”

“You and I were in Ladakh surrounded by sky kissing mountains with snow falling on us while we held hands posing for cozy pictures.”

“Woah, Ladakh! That place was awesome, in fact, I always wanted to go there.” A smile came across her lips by imagining the scenery over there.

“By the way you said some pictures, right?”

“Yep!”

“What pictures?” Her tufted brows raised as eagerness piqued up in her.

“Our pre-wedding shoot.” He said in a booming tone.

“Oooh.”

After a pause, it hit her, “what the… you mean… ”

“What happened? Don’t you like it?”

Her cheeks turned red while she desperately tried to cover her eyes with her slender fingers. “Ahem… It’s… it’s not like that.”

“Then what?”

Her eyes gleamed while her body quivered in nervousness. “Um… I couldn’t probably… ugh! Forget it.”